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| A few thoughts about love | ||
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| Author | Post | ||
| David Echols |
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 | I don't want to say I'm "giving up" on woman. That's not the operative phrase here. It's more a logical conclusion to exclude pursuing a relationship. I don't know if you've seen Helen Fisher talk about the brain in love link, but it's pretty remarkable. It turns out that love activates the same part of the brain that taking cocaine does. That's pretty horrible if you think about it. That means that if you're in love with someone, your entire relationship is predicated around this idea of the "cocaine-center" of your brain being active all the time. The opposite is true with friends you've known for a long time. In fact, with normal friends, all parts of your brain are engaged in activity, from logic, to fun, to judgment.... So it turns out that the best relationships are with the girls you've been friends with since you were a kid, not because you've known them for so long, but because you can trust that their love in you is calculated and not driven by a deep primordial urge first and foremost. Love then, in my opinion, is a deception...something the brain does to make us reproduce. Something that, if pursued on its own, is bound to failure. [ Edited Jul 20 08, 07:49AM ] We do not inherit the earth from our ancestors, we borrow it from our children. - Native American Song | ||
| maverick850 |
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 | ive never read the cocaine part, but if its true then what you are saying makes sense. look at all the divorces we have today, people fall in love, live with each other for a couple of years, then realize that it doesnt work out. but the transition from good friend to partner is a hard switch to make. but whatever, my girlfriend i have now is cool, lets see where it is in a few years | ||
| jkar64 |
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| | Not much I can add to this. Still figuring things out, myself. Up and up... | ||
| Chris O'Neill |
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 | interesting david... see, I gave up on "love" a while back for the simple reason that since 50% of all marriages end in divorce then I probably shouldn't waste my time looking for that one special person. if I find them and "fall in love" then wahoo, but I wouldn't be too crestfallen if I never do. love isn't for every single person in the world, and I might not be one of those people. plus I just seem to attract the crazy people. athens guys know what I'm talking about They call me Mittens... Because I handle sh!t | ||
| jphansen |
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| | Maybe it's not that love sucks, but that cocaine kicks [censored]. I don't stink, that's Beast Mode | ||
| Chris O'Neill |
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| | jimmy, I really just laughed out loud when I read that. They call me Mittens... Because I handle sh!t | ||
| warpigs330 |
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| | or maybe it is because cocaine activates the happy but jittery portion of the brain, much like new love, and friends activate the comfortable and relaxed portion of your brain. I think that arguing that something is bad based on the fact that it activates the same portion of the brain as something that is bad is based on flawed logic. | ||
| maverick850 |
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| | u have a point which i hadnt thought about. but it still says that new love is more of an ecstasy kind of emotion. just like when you take drugs you may get high or whatever. this is a much more natural and healthful way to achieve that same high, but it may still effect your choices. | ||
| jkar64 |
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| | Natural highs FTW. BD I like to think of love as a race car... If you don't work the clutch just right, you're gonna crash... Hard. But if you stay inside the turns and hit the nos at just the right time, you're sure to snag yourself a gold medal. Hahaha XD Race fast safe car B) That's a palindrome, y'all. Up and up... | ||
| Amir Azari |
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| | Zerosigni made a good comment that I still remember, on the PKNA forums: wrote ... Also...a note of relationships and love. Love exists, but it is a trick to make you interested in a person. It's fascination. After that it's compatability that makes the diffference, but even after that..years down the road, it's hard work. And if you're not willing to work for anything, you'll never have a rewarding relationship. | ||
| The Rebel |
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| | love is a tricky thing. Its very important to make sure you are truly in love before you tell someone you love them. If you dont you could trick yourself into staying in a relationship far longer than you should. It happened with me and my ex. It was agonizing. And wat david said about the relationship being stronger with an old friend is true. My current girlfriend has been one of my best friends for awhile and I know I'm going to be her forever. What's "Gravity"? | ||
| brakke |
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 | hey guys, I love some beautiful girl, but how do I exactly know if she loves me to, and how do you american make clear that you love her/him?? I mean you guys tell her/him or just give a kiss to her/him?? parkour everywhere, anywhere bringing people closer together | ||
| jphansen |
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| | Drop your pants, snap and point to your crotch. You'll know soon enough. I don't stink, that's Beast Mode | ||
| brakke |
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| | :p I don't think she would like it so mutch (not that the stuff down there wouldn't be good :p) just... wel we call people who to those things phedofiels :p they get arrested to so maybe some other ideas?? parkour everywhere, anywhere bringing people closer together | ||
| jphansen |
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| | That's not part of the courtship rituals over there? I guess flowers wouldn't hurt. Maybe a killer kong to precision. I don't stink, that's Beast Mode | ||
| Kith |
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| | *facewall* jphansen, stop giving him bad advice. Brakke, tell her how you feel. Honesty = win. Unless you actually dislike her and just want a one-night thing. But then you should tell her how you would feel if she wasn't annoying. "We are not retreating - we are advancing in another direction." -- Douglas MacArthur | ||
| Cody Sellers |
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 | Saint.Albatross wrote ... Unless you actually dislike her and just want a one-night thing. The ole boot and scoot. Personally, I'm bout to give up on true love. Its like Straif said, true love is meant for some people, and if you find it, whoopty-*censor*-hoo. And i paraphrased that by the way. It's just that I've been hurt one too many times. If you don't risk anything, you risk even more. Erica Jong It's choice - not chance - that determines your destiny. Jean Nidetch | ||
| Brian A. Prince |
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| | Personally I always over think relationships. I look at them and say "Whats the point?" I don't really see why I should spend money and time on a girl when she will just leave me for someone else later, and because of that I find myself being the third wheel or just alone. I guess being alone all the time is another reason why I started doing parkour in the first place. beileve in yourself and create your own destiney, don't fear failure. | ||
| brakke |
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| | to princeTAB: I think you just haven't find the girl you've wanted;) just take you're time you'll know when you see her. to jphansen: I'm like 16 and she's 15 :p it would be a) illigal and b) I'm not looking for a one-night stand ;) so I geuss that the honesty thing is the one I heard most I'm afraid. I don't know why but I think that when I tell her all the others will mock me and she'll say no :s some girlfriend from me told me to just kiss her when there's a "great" "moment" (you guys know what I mean :p) I think that's a good idea= pro: I kissed her at least once :p but contra: if she totally not into me (but I think she is) everyone will now and I'll be like some weirdo to her and all the rest :p parkour everywhere, anywhere bringing people closer together | ||
| Kith |
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| | brakke, you know how in parkour sometimes you just have to do something? Don't worry about messing up, focus on the moment. Oh, and don't care if she turns you down. Girls are weird. Note: Please, no girls take offense to that. Guys will never understand women, women will never understand men. It's an accepted fact. "We are not retreating - we are advancing in another direction." -- Douglas MacArthur | ||
| brakke |
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| | yeah man but this is one hell of a fear but I think that I'm gonna say it to/kiss her this weekend, I'd would be like a face plant on metal if she turned me down but you're right all of you thanks for the help well except for the one night stand/ drop you're pants thing :p maybe in the futur ciao and I'll tell you what happend parkour everywhere, anywhere bringing people closer together | ||
| Stevie |
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| | Stay confident, hon, and good luck! There is no spoon. | ||
| jphansen |
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| | Camera Man wrote ... Saint.Albatross wrote ... Unless you actually dislike her and just want a one-night thing. The ole boot and scoot. Personally, I'm bout to give up on true love. Its like Straif said, true love is meant for some people, and if you find it, whoopty-*censor*-hoo. And i paraphrased that by the way. It's just that I've been hurt one too many times. Whatever happens, don't date a stripper and bring her to parkour practice and let her pole dance. Okay, maybe. She was actually pretty strong. I don't stink, that's Beast Mode | ||
| jphansen |
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| | brakke, it's been a while since I've been in the dating scene, but honesty, being nice, being fun, being confident, and not stinking helps (I think). Good luck, buddy. THEN you show her your killer kong-to-precision. I don't stink, that's Beast Mode | ||
| brakke |
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| | tata the story of the camping weekend: There I was, last thing I did was reading you're messages building op confidence. Almost to late at the meeting place, the rest off the poeple from the scouts(I think you guys say boyscout but we have girls to :D :p) to get off and have a lot of fun. I looked around, didn't she her, asked her friends subtle where she was, maybe she's sick or something who knows ?? Or maybe just late?? Her friends told me that she had to study for the schooltests :s bummer, but I had a good time, maybe next time I geuss. I'll let you know when there's something :) parkour everywhere, anywhere bringing people closer together | ||
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